The Realisation That I'm Leaving

Ten weeks. That's all. I have ten weeks left of secondary schooling and then I'm done. I've spent the last 12 years of my life in school (3 different ones but still) and it's really strange to think that it's all ending.

I've been at my current secondary school since I was 11, since I continued through Sixth Form, and I'm really going to miss it. I've not loved every second of my time here, that would be a huge exaggeration, and there are still days when I am joyous that I am leaving all these people behind.

Things I'll miss:

• Memories. I can walk around school and see where I used to chat and gossip, see where I started my longest relationship, where I broke down, where I found out that he liked me or where I first started to feel like an adult. It's terrifying to think that I will be leaving these places, but at least I know that all these places will be there for other people to make those memories.
• Teachers. I can't imagine what it's going to be like not having my favourite teachers encourage me, or just exchange witty banter. I'm pretty dependent on my teachers and I can't imagine life without them.
• School uniform. I will miss wearing a tie everyday. It is a skill I will probably never use again.
• The library. I love that stupid library. It's so warm and cosy and the school Librarian is really nice to me.
• The History and Drama departments. It smells like coffee and mental breakdowns and hours of hard work.
• Feeling like I'm queen of the school. Being in Sixth Form certainly has its perks.

Things I won't miss:

• 'Lower schoolers'. They bumble around with no purpose in life, occasionally making catty comments to you to impress your friends. Not fun.
• School dinners. Don't get me wrong, its not awful but there is a specific smell/taste to everything; bland.
• School uniform. I know I said I'll miss it, but it has 'swings and roundabouts'. I will not miss the days when I am stopped in the corridor and female teachers call me a 'slut' for wearing a skirt above the knee.
• Bells. My entire life at school is controlled by bells, and I don't like this. I am not one of Pavlov's dogs, thank-you.
• Assembly. Nothing kills your morning vibe more than sitting in a room with people you hate and listening to your head of sixth form make inappropriate sexist jokes.
• Plastic chairs/tables with chewing gum underneath/carpets with trodden down food. 

I hope this helps you appreciate school more/empathize if you are also leaving/makes you nostalgic about school.

I, however, am still terrified.

Thanks for reading,
Kitty x

Fight or Flight

There are times when I long to sweep away half the things I am expected to learn; for the overtaxed mind cannot enjoy the treasure it has secured at the greatest cost.- Helen Keller

Stress is a normal physical response to events which make you feel threatened or upset. Your nervous system floods your body with hormones such as adrenaline so it's ready for action.

I've heard quite a few stories about people having a really stressful time at the moment, and all I want to do is wrap them in a duvet, give them a cup of tea and stroke their hair. When I was going through my most stressful times, I would have loved someone to tell me how to deal with and that it would be okay. So, here's my story of stress.

I've always struggled with stress, ever since I began formal examinations and serious school work. Until Sixth Form, I'd generally managed to keep it under control. Once I realised that Year 12 was a massive uphill struggle, I began to stress. Year 12 saw me struggling with Human Biology and whether or not I'd actually be able to pull it off as an AS level, as well as sorting out my Drama performance.

Doing Drama is by far the most stressful experience I've had to date. Everything was going okay until one of the group members became really ill with something contagious so simply couldn't come into school. It was completely terrifying because none of us in the group had any idea what to do. With only two weeks until our exam, we had to carry on without a member and hope she'd be better. I decided to take charge (it's what I do naturally) and try and sort it all out. I reached a point where I would just break down whenever I wasn't doing Drama, and I was unable to concentrate on anything else. In the end, we had to post-pone the performance and we scraped through the exam.

The real issues came at the start of Year 13. I started off the year badly, as I broke up with my long-term boyfriend and felt pretty damn sorry for myself. As a way of forgetting about him, I threw myself into my work and started to compile my life around school. By Christmas I was massively struggling and spending all of my time work or crying. It got to the point where my poor history teacher had to take me aside and tell me straight that I was working too hard, and that I needed to take a step back. I took a deep breath, listened and took his advice.

I'm still stressed. I still get a sickening feel when I come across a problem that I feel I simply can't handle, and I spend far too much time thinking about school; but I'm getting better.

The best way to deal with stress is taking a step back/deep breath and reviewing the situation. It's all about prioritizing what needs to get done and when, and making allowances for yourself to relax. Read a book, lie in bed and just think, or just whatever keeps your mind off whatever is stressing you.

It will be okay, I promise.
Promise me you'll take a break every once in awhile, okay?
Thanks for reading,
Kitty x

An A-level Survival Guide

Disclaimer, A-levels suck.
I'm half kidding, I promise. They're completely new and exciting for all you poor GCSE takers who can't wait to take the subjects you are really passionate about. As I'm ending my time in Sixth Form *panicked crying about leaving school*, I thought I'd give you some tips about how to survive a-levels.

• Take subjects you enjoy. These subjects will basically be your life for the next two years, so don't take something just because you're good at it! Adding to that, being good at something at GCSE doesn't mean it will be an easy ride. Take subjects that you want to scream from the rooftops and write blog posts about. Also, choosing to do subjects that universities really like such as biology, chemistry, physics and maths may seem like a good idea but they will kill your spirit and make you hate education. Try and find a balance!
• Start to actually think about what you want to do in your life. Whether it's uni, college, a job or an apprenticeship look at your options ASAP! It's always better to be prepared, and the time when you actually have to decide comes really quickly.
• Take time to relax each week. Sixth form is a big shock for most people and I know from personal experience that it can really stress you out. One day you'll be sitting doing your work in the library and you'll suddenly find yourself stress crying about life. As long as you have whatever extra-curricular activity makes you happy, you'll be fine!
• Try and act like an adult. This is probably the most obvious piece of advice, and yet the most forgotten. Sixth form is a place where you are in adult limbo; not old enough to be completely responsible but not young enough to act like a huge prat. If you act like a young adult, you will be treated like one. Teachers will respect you and your two years of being overworked and crying will be illuminated by fond memories of your amazing teachers.
• Balance your social life. I say balance as opposed to have or don't have one. Do not party every 'student night', but don't spend all your time working. There will be times when you go out after a long day at school and it will be a lovely release. However, if you decide to go to a gig on a school night, get drunk and subsequently have to post-pone your psychology experiment because you are hungover, you will feel a fool (totally not my experience...)
• Don't waste this opportunity. Once you reach the penultimate months of your time in Sixth form, like I have, you will look back and think "where did the time go" blah blah blah. 

I hope this guide was in some way helpful! 

Thanks for reading,

Kitty x

The Beginning

One fine afternoon, someone suggested that I spread my somewhat limited wisdom on yet another social networking platform.
I want to start a blog all about how to cope with launching into the world of choosing universities, becoming a student nurse,how to plan/survive a gap year and just general life advice. As I learn the hard way, I'll update all you lucky people on how to avoid the mistakes or take the opportunities by the scruff of the neck.

I'll start off the boring way and tell you a bit about myself.
I'm 17 and currently taking 3 a-levels (human biology, psychology, history). I'm hoping to become a nurse in the very near future, but first I've taken the mad decision to attempt to travel the world with my best friend on a very small budget. 

A lot of people have asked me why I'm taking a gap year, and my answers have varied in their truthfulness each time. On my personal statement I made it look like it would really help me excel in my chosen career; an incredibly idealistic view, but I still hope its true.
My friends and teachers and parents all think that it's to earn money and see the world.
But it's really because I don't want to start being a proper adult yet. I want to travel and work long crappy jobs, make slightly stupid decisions and spend money on stupid souvenirs which I'll keep for 30 years whilst I re-tell my gap year stories. With my chosen degree of nursing, you start working in a placement pretty quickly so you're essentially a nurse from that point, and although I think I'm ready to do that one day, this year isn't time. I need a bit more life experience before I can start help other people with theirs. I can't imagine what it would be like to be fresh from 'cushy' sixth form life to being in a position where people genuinely need you; that terrifies me right now. I'm hoping that by this time next year, I'll be desperate to start university and nursing and adult life.

So there you go, I've poured out the truth about my mad reasons for a gap year. 
Stay tuned for more slightly depressing home truths, and rants about how I am winging life.
Thank-you for reading,
Kitty x