The Excellent Exam Guide

Its exam season! Yay! Endless weeks of being tested on things you've learnt in the past year (or two years if you've suffered Gove's reforms)!
As you may well know, I am about to complete my A2s (second year of a-levels), so these will be my last exams taken in school. That would be exciting if these exams weren't so important that if I fail them I have to recalculate my life plan.
Anyway, everybody is stressed and exhausted and nervous about exams so I thought I'd share some tips on how to make exams more fun. (These are all things which I have done during exams.)

• Write in blue ink- The possibility of being disqualified really increases the fun suspense until results day.
• Write incredibly quickly- Instead of sticking to the time limits which you set yourself to complete that essay, finish it in 20 minutes. Then take an obnoxious break, stretch your arms and cough loudly to let everyone know you're way ahead of schedule.
• Don't bring a calculator to a calculator maths exam- You're clever enough to do it all in your head.
• Make a tower of of stationary- Be creative. The invigilators are so bored and I'm sure they'll really appreciate the wobbling tower of the contents of your pencil case. Especially when it all falls on the floor.
• Sit in the wrong seat- A quick and easy way to confuse both yourself and everyone else in the room about why you've sat in a seat without an exam paper. When you have to not-so-subtly slide into the seat in front of you, the embarrassment will cause an adrenaline rush and you'll do better!
• Drink a ridiculous amount of water until you start choking- Once you've completed your exam paper, challenge yourself to drink the rest of your water. When you begin to choke and an invigilator has to come and ask if you're okay, you've won!

Hope your exams go okay; good luck and stay calm.

Thanks for reading,

Kitty x

How Not To Revise

Revision is not a fun pass-time, or at least it isn't for me. As you may remember, I am revising for my A2s which will be my last exams taken in school ever. Due to this, several different family members/friends/teachers keep telling me that "it's a hard push now but it will be over soon". I am perfectly aware of this, but it doesn't make it easier- I would rather just give up and become a full time crazy dog woman. Nevertheless, I have spent this past week of Easter break revising, and I couldn't help but think of ways which I could (unsuccessfully) revise whilst having fun.
So I made a list of things to try at home to spice up revision!

- Take a shot every time you get a question right, so you get drunk and revise at the same time! Everybody knows alcohol makes you remember better.

-If you get a question wrong, do 10 push ups. Your brain will work harder to not get them wrong or you'll be so muscly that you won't need to revise, you can simply impress the examiner.

- Do an Easter Egg hunt thing around your house, but with clues as exam questions.

- Remove your eyeballs and imprint mind maps on them, but remember to put your eyeballs back in your head.

-Busk revise! Speak through and explain the topics you're revising on the street to the public. It will stay in your head and someone will probably hopefully give you money. Either through pity or insanity.

- Pretend that you are learning everything in order to survive a Zombie Apocalypse. Really commit to the part by only dressing in rags and carrying a large weapon during your allotted revision time.

- Turn yourself into a Disney princess and swish your hair out of a window whilst singing what your revision is. You can then re-enact the songs during the exam!

- Create a trap in your house in which you can only escape from if you do an hour of revision and a past paper.

- If you get really desperate, try snorting/smoking/ingesting your revision notes just before the exam. Your body will then soak up the information due to the Adrenaline and you'll pass with flying colours!

I hope these will help over the next few months when we are all revising. Best of luck mes amigos!
Thanks for reading,
Kitty x